Say Something in Japanese!
There are certain things you hear as a Japanese learner that cause a varying range of reactions and emotions. I’ve covered to death over the years “Nihongo wa jouzu!” But there is another one that produces a different type of confusion. You can’t escape it, and it doesn’t even involve talking to a Japanese person (hopefully…)
“Say something in Japanese!”
The why
The most open ended request imaginable. And the result of someone finding out you are either studying or good at Japanese. Japanese is not something you hear every day come out of the mouth of a non-Japanese person. So the thought of getting to see that is a cool spectacle. It’s a parlor trick to be done in front of multiple people.
Initial gut reaction
I honestly never know the appropriate way to respond. Because it doesn’t matter what I say. No one is going to understand it.
I used to think… well I could just answer “何か.” But that is just as unoriginal and boring as saying “something” when someone says “say something.” Also, the person asking doesn’t want to hear just one word. They want an onslaught of something that sounds amazingly Japanese and beyond human comprehension.
My response is pretty boring and usually goes something like:
Adam: はい、ホンモノの日本語を話しています。よく聞いてください。
Them: Wow! What did you just say?!
Adam: I said “okay, I’m speaking real Japanese. Please listen carefully.”
Them: Say something cooler!
Adam: …
What’s your response?
I haven’t cracked the clever(?) responses like I did with jouzu. I’m sure all of you have had this experience from friends, family, and strangers though. How have you handled a “say something in Japanese?”
Founder of Jalup. iOS Software Engineer. Former attorney, translator, and interpreter. Still watching 月曜から夜ふかし weekly since 2013.
I have only been in this situation once, and did not expect the question, so I just replied something along the lines “Would you be able to understand if I did?”. The other person did concede that she would not and we moved on to something else.
I can relate to the initial feeling of “why did they just ask me to do that?!”, but I guess in the end it probably is just the other person wanting to express interest in what one is putting so much time into, so nothing too harmful :-)
I do not know though how I would react if I were asked to do that more often.
I’ve asked that same question as well.
I agree that it’s definitely a harmless question. Figuring out a reaction can save you in being caught off guard though
This (amusing) thread has some good options https://twitter.com/daphne_mir/status/1204173635683930112 notably この番組はご覧のスポンサーの提供でお送りします
I actually really like this. Bonus points if said in a train announcer voice:
まもなく1番線に電車がまいります。危ないですから 黄色い線の内側まで お下がり下さい。
In a similar vein to this, I just go with the navi line that got burned into my memory from driving in Hokkaido:
「速度超過を感知しました。安全な運転を心がけましょう」
I swear I wasn’t even going that fast – people were zooming by on the right at +20kph and the navi was still politely telling me off T_T
This has happened to me a couple times and caught me off balance. After pausing for a minute because I couldn’t think of what to say then they asked a specific line. That’s extra hard because now I have to play English to Japanese translator in my brain and usually there are vocabulary holes so it makes the request even harder and you sounds like you don’t even know Japanese. Lol
My recommendation is just think of something basic like self introduction that has some value to practice so you are prepared. This will happen.
Being asked for translation on the spot is tough.
It can be even worse when they want you to then teach them how to say it.
I really like the idea with the self introduction. Not only because it is good practice, but also because there will be some words which your conversation partner will understand (e.g. your name) which gives them the feeling to understand what is going on and hopefully allows for a smooth continuation of the conversation.
Just say a badass anime catchphrase with a really cool accent if you have any memorised
Ooh that’s a good idea. I use that to get a laugh out of JP speakers, but it’d totally work for this case too now that you mention it.
「下がれ、下がれ悪漢どもよ！その目を見開き、しかと見よう！この、正義の一撃を！」
Haha-I usually go with the literal 何か日本語で！分かる？ The other person typically seems astonished by such a silly-and sarcastic-reply. If only it were that easy to be fluent! :)